Korean Poem "Jealousy Is My Strength" / by Ki Hyung-do ( 질투는 나의 힘 / 기형도 作 )

 "Jealousy Is My Strength" / by Ki Hyung-do

                                         질투는 나의 힘 / 기형도 作

 After a very long time has passed,

아주 오랜 세월이 흐른 뒤에

A feeble bookmark will let this paper fall.

힘없는 책갈피는 이 종이를 떨어뜨리리

For in those days, my heart built so many factories—

그때 내 마음은 너무나 많은 공장을 세웠으니

Foolishly, I had so much to record.

어리석게도 그토록 기록할 것이 많았구나

Like a dog wandering slowly beneath the clouds,

구름 밑을 천천히 쏘다니는 개처럼

I lingered in the air, never tiring.

지칠 줄 모르고 공중에서 머뭇거렸구나

I possessed nothing but sighs;

나 가진 것 탄식밖에 없어

Gazing at my youth standing on evening streets,

저녁 거리마다 물끄러미 청춘을 세워두고

I marveled as I counted the days I had lived.

살아온 날들을 신기하게 세어보았으니

No one feared me,

그 누구도 나를 두려워하지 않았으니

And the substance of my hope was nothing but jealousy.

내 희망의 내용은 질투뿐이었구나

And so, for now, I leave this brief note here:

그리하여 나는 우선 여기에 짧은 글을 남겨둔다

My life wandered madly in search of love,

나의 생은 미친 듯이 사랑을 찾아 헤매었으나

Yet never once did I love myself.

단 한 번도 스스로를 사랑하지 않았노라

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About the Author

Ki Hyung-do

(March 13, 1960 – March 7, 1989) was a South Korean poet and journalist. His posthumous poetry collections include *Black Leaf in the Mouth* and *I Write After Losing Love*.

Ki Hyung-do possessed a beautiful soul at the age of twenty; perhaps he should be called the Yun Dong-ju of the *fin de siècle*. 

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On a day when I suddenly find myself thinking of Ki Hyung-do—a genius poet whose life was cut far too short...

I recall the days of my own wandering twenties, when I would hold his poetry collections and find myself both weeping and smiling.

I am suddenly reminded of that young person I was in my twenties—someone who could not love themselves and envied the world and others.